Time for Tea, by Mark Davison

On an uninspiring dank and dreary January afternoon, I headed east along the A25 following the signs to Redhill and Godstone.

After the main road rises up out of Redhill, soon there are views across to the North Downs, and here and there glimpses of the landfill sites where much of the county's waste is buried.

The road follows the ridge at Nutfield from where there are also panoramic views in the other direction towards the South Downs.

Most of the little village shops in "top" Nutfield are no longer in existence – the post office, newsagents and bakers being confined to the memory of older residents.

Soon I was in Bletchingley, one of the most historic villages in Surrey.

The Whyte Harte dates back to the 14th century and the church to the Norman period. The walls of the tower are said to be some five feet thick in places.

I turned off at the church and followed the twisty lane down to Bletchingley Golf Club where breakfasts, lunches and afternoon teas are served in the bright and breezy restaurant not just to golfers but to the public.

In the car park, two golfing gents were chuckling about a Lotus-type sports car which one of the members owned and which was parked nearby.

"Not much room for the clubs inside!" said one of the players to his pal.

I was quite surprised to see just how many gents were gathered for lunch or a coffee, after a morning's play.

And in an adjoining room, a party of women "doing lunch" were sipping wine and polishing off a hearty meal.

I wondered up to the counter and noticed a menu. Not feeling in the mood for sandwiches and baguettes – and the weather being so dull, drizzly and dismal – I decided to cheer myself with a mushroom, cheese and bacon omelette with chips and a side salad.

I then took a seat and gazed out the window at the greens and the distant Surrey hills.

In the distance, the endless stream of traffic on the M25 could be made out.

A card on the table advertised a "murder mystery evening" on Saturday February 18. The title of the event was "Chalet Eidelweissville" and underneath were the words: "Who is the victim?"

The event starts at 7pm and the price of £20 per person includes a two-course buffet. The dress code is "ski or apres ski".

A member of staff came up and apologised that there may be a small delay but the kitchen had been exceptionally busy.

"No problem at all," I said.

The meal arrived minutes later. I was most grateful. It looked piping hot and delicious.

"Any sauces, sir?" I was asked. "Mayonnaise, please," I smiled.

No sooner had a pot of the mayo been brought to the table, than there was an unfortunate mishap.

I caught the pot with my sleeve and it darted off the table and landed upside down on the floor. I gingerly lifted the tablecloth to see what the damage was. A huge heap of mayo lay splattered across the carpet.

"Excuse me," I said to the waitress. "I'm afraid I've had a little accident."

Realising that this could be misconstrued, I pulled back the tablecloth to expose the damage.

"Oh don't worry about that!" said a waiter who made the examination. He went off to fetch a large damp cloth to clear up. He also brought a replacement pot.

It was at this point I recognised one of the retired ladies sitting nearby. We exchanged hearty greetings and she came over to have a chat.

She related a curious tale to me.

A short while ago she was shopping in Redhill High Street near the old Woolworth store when she heard her Scottish surname called out. She immediately turned round to see who was calling.

It turned out that no one was actually calling her. It was a man who was talking into a mobile phone, ringing someone on a remote Scottish island. My friend and the stranger began chatting and he said he was part of a film crew and they were posting a letter from Redhill to the remote Scottish isle to see how long it took to get there.

And sure enough, some time later, my friend was watching television and saw the scene from Redhill and also a clip of the letter being delivered to the isle.

Furthermore, she noticed herself in the background of the Redhill clip.